real life jokes, real life true jokes, true story jokes, stupid true story jokes, stupid jokes

Jokes, funny stories. True story jokes that happend in real life.

Once I was playing bowling with a friend, he was leading with some points, I managed to walk where he usually stood and shot the ball and spitted on the floor. He fell when his turn, this happend twice, so I won the bowling round with just a few points.

I went to a kiosk to buy some beers and just chatted friendly with the kiosk man. I later went and passed by and suddenly the kiosk man got angry and started shouting.. I shouted back and I left and went close to the police area. There some europeans wanted to sell me narcotics, cokain, a serious drug.. I said no and the police came after a while and wanted to arrest me and I spent one hour with the officers until they drove me home. The irony!

I was drinking and driving and suddenly heard a sound. I kept driving and the day later a person phoned and said she would pay off the damage in the car. The damage was already there, from before, but she thought she had done it. I got paid for drinking and driving!


One afternoon I thought I'd make a party of a very fine day with the sun shining strong. Because I am a mental patient from before, having been commited multiple times, I thought Id stay calm during the day but during my 3rd beer I, whilest sitting in a cafeteria with plenty of people around me, added some sugar on the table to play for my self my own inner state of carneval, in such type of mentality - and I lined the sugar so it would seem as cokain.. I sniffed it and smiled as I thought some of the persons around me would think it was real drugs. What happend later was to my big surprise, the police came and handcaffed me and I was sent to a doctor who with no reason spoke of my condition as diseased and I was sent to a mental hospital and where I was, I believe, tested for drugs.

A neighbour came after me shitting on the toilet and he said it smelled beans. People mostly like food, even beans so he ment hiddenly that my shit smelled good. LOL

I went to at an earlier neighbour and I went to her kitchen and ate powder similar cookies used to wash clothes. It was dark and I didnt see.

At one time during school when I was young I got depressed and just couldnt deliver essays and tests as good as before. So, I decided to go to a site called propaganda at .no and downloaded an essay. I delivered the essay to my teacher and a day afterwards she called my name and asked me what this was about. I didnt understand and she showed me the URL of the propaganda essay website.

fun picture funny picture car crash

I got arrested for destroying some wires and the police handcaffed me. When in the car, I thought of how to punish them back. I shitted on me and as I smoked and drunk that night the smell wasn't pleasant. The car had locked windows behind and there was a police officer who was sitting besides me. I threw the clothing later and the toilet in jail has a quite strong flush, it took down the whole boxer shorts.

I betted that if I didnt hit the bullseye, with one throw, after playing for half an hour, I would play the total of time 30min. and I was sick and tired after already playing. I didnt miss!


A past friend and me had bought lot's of alcohol, I bought one bottle of Jack Daniels, with 2 six packs of beers. We drunk but then I went out for a while and when I came back the friend had locked the door and gone to sleep. I had to drink so I managed without braking the window to come inside. He still to this day can not understand how I managed to enter, and me either.

Once me and my brother watched a tv show for young people where a question came up about how to be with a girl during a date. This question was a competition from the norwegian channel NRK Norge. I started running to the computer and having my brother after me I typed this on the email: "I would tell the bartender to put some booze in the girls soda.."

I sent the email and we went back to the TV. Then the programmer picked a paper from hundreds and started saying what I sent as an email on national TV. He after reading it realized the mistake and destroyed the paper and said that this is something not suitable for kids show. My mothers name came up, a psychiatrist, as we used her email by mistake.